No television. No internet. Friends that can be counted on one hand. How do we keep from going crazy in Hangchat? A lot of book reading, journal writing, movie watching, puzzle making (that’s all Erin), and for me, boredom snacking. Strike one. The main event of every weekday (and weekend spent in Hangchat) is meal time with Lan. Because we have nothing to do, and Lan doesn’t either, we try to stretch our meals to take up as much time as possible. When we have finished loitering for as much time as possible at the local restaurant, we will often (2-3 times per week) go grab a milkshake at the traffic light, or perhaps some doughnuts at the stand across from Lan’s house (an additional 1-2 times per week). Strike two. What does our Thai diet consist of? Some variation of a rice or noodle dish, usually fried, every day and every night. Strike three. Three strikes and you’re fat.
“Have you gained weight or lost weight in Thailand?” Thai people often ask with a big grin. Gained, gained, gained, gained. Luckily, we have found a way to both fight the battle of the bulge and occupy some time! Back in early November, Lan informed us that her sister-in-law teaches aerobics classes, in the ‘fitness center’ parking lot on Tuesday evenings. Aerobics? Say no more. I will participate in any form of exercise that involves dance music. We have since become regulars at Tuesday evening aerobics class. And the best news? It’s free . . .okay, well everything is relatively free in Hangchat, but this is literally FREE! A few words about aerobics. The tempo of the Thai dance music seems about 20 times faster than music in any American aerobics class I ever attended. Maybe it’s just the scorching Thai heat that restricts my movement, and makes the tempo seem faster. Our theory is that Thai people are small, with short limbs, and they can move more quickly than us gangly Americans. I will say, however, that I’ve developed a love for this corny, Thai, disco-esque, dance/love music. It usually involves women singing in shrill voices or men whining.
Who are our classmates? Well, we are the only white people, (obviously. . .this is Hangchat, after all). We are also the youngest attendees. I can safely say that the vast majority of the 15-20 Thais are over 40 years old, probably over 50 years old. (Try to guess a Thai’s age sometime. Nearly impossible). One woman proudly informed us one day that she is 76 years old. Erin and I are convinced that one of the women is over 80. About half of them are overweight, and I’m pretty sure they just attend in order to socialize with their girlfriends. They don’t prance with feeling.
People come and go as they please. Some only come for the stretching portion. Some come halfway through. People are in and out throughout the hour. Also, because it’s a parking lot, we have to dodge bicycles, motorbikes, and sometimes cars. It’s the parking lot of the miniscule fitness center, as well as the fire station, and, I’m pretty sure, the electric company.
Only one man attends. Erin thinks there is something wrong with him. Like, maybe all the upstairs bulbs aren’t screwed in properly. He always proudly prances in the front row and his movements are rather spastic. He sort of thrashes his arms and legs around, in a way that makes us think he’s joking. But his face is always deadpan. Recently he’s begun attempting to communicate with us. He’s asked us how to spell a Thai name in English. (HA! ) He’s also asked us what one says in English, to tell a naughty student to sit properly in his chair. (‘Sit in your seat!’ – the title of my as yet, unpublished memoir). These questions make us think that he’s a teacher. Erin’s theory of a mental handicap might have to be abandoned. Or perhaps the teaching is the cause of his mental handicap.
A final comment about Thai aerobics class – it involves a lot of hip wiggling and thrusting. It seems that this holds true throughout the country, as our friend farther north made a similar comment about an aerobics class that she attends. I love watching the elderly ladies, (and the crazy man) move their hips in such a sassy way.
Enjoy the video, and make your own observations.Is Thai aerobics keeping me in shape? Not really. The skirts are getting tighter and tighter with each passing week. But, my classmates keep me thoroughly entertained, I sweat a whole lot, I get to gyrate without shame to some pretty catchy music, and I feel just a smidge less guilty about those pints of Wall’s ice cream I devour after naughty-children-filled days. 
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